Time to get my shit together

It’s hard to believe it’s been a month since my last post. I’ve been avoiding my blog as I’ve not been in a good place or state and didn’t want to write about a series of depressing backslides and fails.

I’m feeling bashed and beaten up enough to come crawling back here to try to get my shit together and get back into building some sober time.

I spent this hungover morning reading the first few chapter of The sober revolution – by Lucy Rocca and Sarah Turner. I’m finding it a great read so far, consistently punctuated by my weary nods of recognition.

The denial needs to end and the acceptance and real commitment needs to begin. I’m trying again…

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16 thoughts on “Time to get my shit together

  1. noddysober June 16, 2016 / 2:05 pm

    We’re all here to support you! You will learn from this. There really is no point in drinking. Once you get to the stop/start stage there is no going back to normal drinking. Sobriety is the only option. Life will get better and better from now on.

    Liked by 2 people

    • tiredoftreadingwater June 16, 2016 / 5:08 pm

      Thank you so much Noddy for your support. My head agrees but there’s still some part of me that I obviously don’t have full awareness of that’s kicking and screaming and kicking up some serious tantrum shit! I’m working on it…:/

      Liked by 1 person

  2. David K June 16, 2016 / 2:10 pm

    We, the reader, are out here for you! I’ve had my stops and goes; I think when you fall off the wagon, you have to get right back up on it and learn from your mistakes. There are so many resources out there, I love listening to podcasts on the way to and from work. I find when I am less vigilant, that’s when the thoughts of alcohol return.

    Liked by 2 people

    • tiredoftreadingwater June 16, 2016 / 5:05 pm

      Hi David, thank you so much for your comment. It really helps to hear from other people and makes me feel supported. I also love podcasts, I am able to listen to them for about 25 hours a week while I’m working which is great ๐Ÿ™‚ The SHAIR podcast is my favourite at the moment.

      Liked by 1 person

      • David K June 19, 2016 / 10:49 am

        I like Recovery Elevator but will give SHARE a try.

        Liked by 1 person

      • tiredoftreadingwater June 21, 2016 / 7:26 am

        Thanks! I’ll check out Recovery Elevator, I heard it mentioned on a podcast just last night. SHAIR looks like a typo but it’s an acronym for Sharing Helps Addicts In Recovery.

        Like

  3. thisgrrlcrazy June 16, 2016 / 5:13 pm

    I’ve been having the ups and downs too and also avoiding the blogging so I get it. We can only keep trying and today is the day ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿผ *hugs* for you!

    Liked by 1 person

    • tiredoftreadingwater June 16, 2016 / 6:47 pm

      Thank you! I’m sorty you are having a hard time as well. We can definitely keep trying! Hugs to you too โ˜บ

      Liked by 1 person

      • thisgrrlcrazy June 16, 2016 / 7:00 pm

        Yeah it’s a real son of a bitch!! I keep flip flopping…I REALLY WANT it then I cave, then feel like crap for caving and mad at myself and I think why I chose to drink? It didn’t DO ANYTHING to enhance any of the situations at all and left me feeling crappy. *shaking my head*. BUT we aren’t alone and we are ahead of the game I think knowing everything we know and at least trying xo

        Liked by 1 person

      • tiredoftreadingwater June 17, 2016 / 7:32 pm

        I think we do learn a bit each time it happens. I wish I knew that mysterious something that makes sobriety click for good for us all. As you say at least a beginners level of knowing and trying is a good step towards where we need to go x Baby steps… x

        Like

  4. ainsobriety June 16, 2016 / 6:42 pm

    Kept trying.
    Do something different.
    You can do this. It is so much easier to live without the bashing.
    Hugs
    Anne

    Liked by 2 people

    • tiredoftreadingwater June 16, 2016 / 6:51 pm

      Thanks Anne. I just made up a commitment/sober visualisation meditation so that’s a little new thing already. Easier would be good. Hugs to you too โ˜บ

      Like

  5. winoholicblog June 17, 2016 / 12:57 am

    You can do it. Just think about how much better life is, when you’re not a slave to alcohol.

    Liked by 1 person

    • tiredoftreadingwater June 17, 2016 / 7:26 pm

      Thank you. I am really thinking about it a lot and the freedom and lightness it brings when I manage to keep going. Today was another sober day, I hope you hsd a good one too ๐Ÿ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

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