Day 12

I had to check my day counting app to find out how many days I am at. In previous attempts to quit I’ve often found the first couple of weeks to be the easier, gentler part of the process and I’m having a similar experience again. Apart from my 2-day headache and some occasional fleeting thoughts about wine it has been pretty uneventful during the last 12 days.

To me, early sobriety often feels like the feeling you get when you slip into clean, fresh cotton sheets. It’s a rest and respite, a break from the self-abuse, breathing space for my poor knackered body. The struggle comes for me when the sober sheets have become crumpled, sweaty and covered in cat hairs. The doubts and bargaining come a few weeks in when the novelty has worn off. I guess I’ve had enough attempts over the last 2 years to know this about myself by now.

Yesterday I went shopping in town which I always find exhausting. Busy places just drain my energy. When I got home I had an aimless, tired but restless feeling. I didn’t know what to do with myself and felt too flat to do anything productive but I was thinking I shouldn’t really go to bed. I recognised it as exactly the kind of feeling I would spend an afternoon into evening drinking away. To hell with shoulds/shouldn’ts, I went to bed and ended up sleeping until midnight and then I got up and fell asleep on the sofa again about 3 hours later. I can hardly believe how much I’ve slept this time around.

I’ve been trying to look after myself a bit better. I bought a rebounder and I absolutely love it. I’ve only skipped a day if I feel ill or am in pain and all other days I’ve thoroughly enjoyed bouncing around and getting a sweat on. Apparently there are huge amounts of lymph channels within the liver and as rebounding is supposed to be great for moving the lymph it figures that it may be good for helping my poor liver to detox and recover from any booze damage. I also bought a hard skin remover for my feet. I’m not generally one for buying beauty gadgets but I realised my feet made a hard tapping noise when I hit them with my finger nails (nice!!), and the hard skin is getting painful 😦

There’s something I’ve been meaning to mention for a while now. I’m unable to leave a comment on blogspot blogs. When I go there and try to use my wordpress ID it looks like it’s accepting it but when the comment is previewed it’s defaulting to an old google ID that I don’t even remember setting up. I’m looking for a way around this but I just wanted to let my blogger using visitors know that I’m not ignoring you. I really appreciate the comments and support that come from you and I’m sorry I can’t reciprocate at the moment. Does anybody else have the same problem or know a way around this?

I think it’s time to go and supervise some cat chaos. I can hear my cat growling and screeching through the cat flap at a visitor trying to make friends with her. It’s a daily ritual at the moment.

Strength and hugs to anybody struggling, have a good, sober day folks πŸ™‚ x

 

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21 thoughts on “Day 12

  1. mooseylou January 12, 2017 / 10:58 am

    I love the sheet analogy! Also what is the rebounder?

    Liked by 3 people

    • Elizabeth January 12, 2017 / 11:38 am

      It’s a mini trampoline, moosey. Excellent for health and fun!

      Liked by 2 people

      • tiredoftreadingwater January 12, 2017 / 11:54 am

        It sure is fun. I even woke up one morning and wondered if it was too early to get up and bounce. I get excited about exercise with it πŸ˜€

        Liked by 3 people

      • mooseylou January 12, 2017 / 11:56 am

        Ohhhhhhhhhh! I would probably break a leg!

        Liked by 3 people

      • Elizabeth January 12, 2017 / 1:25 pm

        If you insist on thinking those thoughts, then yes you best stay away! πŸ™‚ You don’t bounce high- it’s more the gentle bounce and it get’s your lymphatic system to drain more efficiently. PS Many of them come with a bar that you can attach for balance. Love you sister.

        Liked by 2 people

    • tiredoftreadingwater January 12, 2017 / 12:01 pm

      Thanks moosey πŸ™‚ Rebounders are mini-trampolines that are supposed to be extremely good for your health, and fun. I get the urge to go running but I can’t because I’ve injured both my knees over the years so this is a low-impact option for me to jump around.

      Liked by 2 people

      • mooseylou January 12, 2017 / 1:34 pm

        I hurt my leg falling through a porch last summer and it is still not completely healed to the degree I am able to perform high impact. I will go check the trampoline out!

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Elizabeth January 12, 2017 / 11:36 am

    Oh boy did I need this belly laugh! From the sheet analogy to the rebounder to yes, even the ability to “tap dance” without shoes (I also bought an Amoepe for my calloused heels) . Oh, oh- can’t forget the cat chaos. I could have written this post and I’m also right there with you on day 12! We must be sisters. ❀ and hugs

    Liked by 3 people

    • tiredoftreadingwater January 12, 2017 / 11:58 am

      Hi Elizabeth, I’m glad you got a laugh πŸ™‚ I don’t know about tap ‘dancing’ it’d be more of a tap stumble – I can’t dance! Fortunately the cat is now quiet and snoozing so it’s all calmed down. Hugs to you too on your day 12 x

      Liked by 2 people

  3. freefallingintoasoberlife January 12, 2017 / 3:48 pm

    Good for you on day 12! I know that “tired, restless feeling” you speak of! And so crazy that we think drinking a ton of whatever will be good for it! When instead, it only perpetuates and deepen the horrible cycle!
    That jumpy thing sounds like the perfect anecdote for getting rid of that restlessness not to mention draining the lymphatic system!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I Quit Wineing January 12, 2017 / 10:31 pm

    I have the same problem on blogger. It reverts to an old unused google account. Most annoying.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. gagalgoingdry January 17, 2017 / 6:17 am

    Hope you’re still doing well and glad to hear the crankiness at Day 12 – 13 was not just unique to me… I was doing so good and then BAM, Miss Crankypants came to town and she stayed from Day 12 – Day 15….. What the hell!!!! I guess I had some obscene notion it would get easier but I reevaluated and have come to see that not all days will be sunshine and light, that there are still some cloudy ones ahead but I still don’t need to dull them with the drink… Day 17 Today!

    Liked by 1 person

    • tiredoftreadingwater January 18, 2017 / 10:08 am

      Hi, well done on day 17 πŸ™‚ I guess the pink clouds drift in and out and we don’t get to ride them every day. The cranky pants always drift away too though which is good. I agree that the drink just dulls the darker days even more. Take care, be well πŸ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Paul S January 18, 2017 / 2:11 pm

    Congrats on 12 days!

    I found that for the first few *months* I was a bit of a zombie. The first few weeks all I wanted to do (and did when I could) was sleep. Remember the body and mind are going through major changes – you are denying what it *feels* like is a vital substance. I know many many folks who recall the same – the need for sleep hitting hard and heavy. And that feeling does pass. So don’t get too down on that – we readjust!

    Exercise is good – I feel a strong link between mind, body and spirit. Just keep it gentle and don’t overdo it (what, US overdo things?? ha ha)

    Great stuff!

    Cheers
    Paul

    Liked by 1 person

    • tiredoftreadingwater January 19, 2017 / 7:59 am

      Hi Paul, thank you for your encouraging words, I appreciate it. I just woke up from yet another sofa snooze but I’m thoroughly enjoying the extra sleep πŸ˜€ Best wishes!

      Liked by 1 person

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