This morning I got home after work with an aching shoulder and the feeling that I may be heading ino a stomach bug. It was a long, hard night. People were cranky and arguing and the manager moped around with a face like a slapped arse. Maybe the heat is getting to everybody? I don’t know. Despite this, the poetry muse decided to make an appearance. Seriously?! Now?! I know better than to ignore it so I got a pen and pad and off I went.
Last night I was thinking loads about a few of the recent blogs posts I’ve read. Some were from new people contemplating the possibility of quitting. Some were from the newly sober and doubt-ridden and some from people returning for another sobriety attempt. I think this poem was inspired by you and is for you all. It’s quite long and gets a little dark but as I still have no idea where it comes from, you can complain to whoever is pushing these words into my head ;D
Why not today?
You are going to quit, just not today
What’s the rush? you think
Maybe tomorrow? I hear you say
Wolfie gives me a big sly wink
Or maybe next week? There’s an idea
One last weekend to riot
It’s a busy month, my friends are all here
Maybe next month? Then I’ll be quiet
You don’t think it wise to hurry and push
Life is for living you know
There’s always next year, what’s the big rush?
You’re still only young, time will go slow
Without your permission the years jump ahead
Plans fall apart, dreams fade and die
Yeah, I’ll quit soon, you repeatedly said
Why not today? You glower and sigh
Maybe next decade? That will be time
to slow down and settle myself
Yes, later you say. And then I’ll be fine
I still have my money, my mind and my health
Later creeps in, as quick as a flash
Breaking your body and dimming your sight
The life in your veins a dwindling stash
You’re starting to fear that long dark night
You can’t quit now! You need your best friend
The one that’s two-faced and sold you all lies
Who’s going to comfort me, right till the end?
The one that hid truth and stifled the cries
of your heart in the dark, it’s magic unfound
Your true life unlived, your time has run out
Too many laters, much skirting around
the issue at hand. Too much fear and doubt
I’m leaving you now, the false friend decides
so many will follow you here
My next victim waits for their fantasy ride
Hoping to take away all pain and fear
So long, no hard feelings, it was just a con
but maybe it’s still not too late?
For your heart to flourish and sing its song
For your eyes to open and soul to wake
So scream and shout, grieve and cry
then cast it out, don’t allow it to take
and more of your life, it’s time to fly
So, why not today? It’s worth a try
I’ve taken some oregano oil and some grapefruit seed extract which are truly two of the most challenging flavours on the face of the earth. They are both reputed to be potently anti-bacterial, anti-viral and hopefully anti-spending my day puking with my face in the toilet. Fingers crossed! I’m off to bed.
Have a good day folks x